for who curious, i found solution to all my problems
the remote start shut off after 5 seconds is due to Tach RPM monitor mode, i didn't know i have to train the remote restart unit to learn the RPM first. once i done that, it starts up on first try, and stays on, no more 2nd retry, even on cold engine start
i also found my 2002 camry 4cyl LE japanese built came with built-in trunk motor for power remote trunk release, even though it doesn't comes with keyless entry or toyota VIP alarm.
wire located at driver kick panel, 12 pin white connector.
the wire for power trunk is white with blue stripe, a little thicker than the rest of the wires,
and i use a 5 wires relay to activate it, (not 4 wires, need to use all 5 wires)
12 V constant power to relay pin 85 (positive) and relay pin 87 (positive), trunk trigger from alarm to relay pin 86 (negative), cut the power trunk (white with blue stripe) wire at driver kick panel, relay pin 87A (negative?) to power trunk switch side. relay pin 30 (positive) to power trunk motor side.
power trunk release wire rest on Grounded, and activate on 12V+, so White/blue stripe wire must cut, and that explain why i blown a fuse earlier without cutting the power trunk wire .
save me alot of time don't have to have to run the wire to the trunk, and don't have to install an aftermarket solenoid to pull the trunk.
http://www.commandocaralarms.com/dow...unkrelease.pdf
use the 3rd diagram where it saids
"This configuration is used when the output from
the vehicle's trunk release switch rests at ground
and a 12 Volt pulse can not be applied directly to
the wire. Always fuse the 12 Volt supply to the
relay."