Thanks for the replies.
I've identified the starter and given her a hammer and a piece of wood as a temporary fix (

) which seems to work, for now.
Just to explain the problem better, the starter motor will turn over and it will sound like it's outputting a lot of torque, but there will be nothing from the engine. After a while (5, 10 seconds), if you're lucky, the engine will start to turn over, slowly at first but then quicker until it fires. If it's in a starting mood then the engine will turn over twice, if that, and then catch.
When it's not starting, having the car in gear and trying to start the engine will make the car jerk, which I think rules out damaged flywheel or starter teeth, but then take it out of gear and the engine won't turn over. (really confusing!) Next time it's not starting I'm going to pull a spark plug and see if the engine is turning over or not.
If the contacts are worn in the plunger, as described in the link above, then would the starter turn over? I have a feeling the starter solenoid is at fault (more specifically, the pull in or hold in coil). Does anyone have any experience replacing solenoids?
Thanks again.