Ok, its not really my car...but I'm babysitting. Heres the rundown...
91 sedan 200k miles 100k of which was driving pizza in the mountain state.
Its a dull maroon color with cracks all over it (like chapped lips)
Its the base model, window crank from a 61 chevy (chrome, with crystal knob), bungee cord to keep the shifter in 5, incence burner on the dash, and a large, "I'm with Budha" sticker covering some of the instraments. It has no tach. The inspection sticker looks like used gift wrap and has our state police logo drawn on with a felt tip pen. It is held in place with scotch tape and a hard rock cafe t shirt jammed behind it. The windshied (which no longer shields wind), passenger A-pillar, fender and corner lights are smashed due to the owners neglegence. the same corner light previously caught fire, and melted black plastic hardened on the bumber. The grill is nylon chicken wire with a camry's "toyota" emblen zip tied on. The front left headlight is clamped in by the bent fender and is from a nissan sentra. the headlight wiring harnesses (harnessi?) are incompatible, and therfore the the light in nonoperational. some filements of the tail ligths are out and every housing is broken. The floormats are from an acura vigor, and have homemade, cool-aide, tie die patterns on them. It has an oversized foot shaped gas pedal. The headliner is partially removed, and sagging. The aftermarket sunroof leaks and the insulation is mildewed. It's exhaust leak screams like a banshee over 3krpms. The plates are switched with some reguarity, and bogus ID's are kept in the vehicle at all times. Insurance in photoshopped. All the badges have fallen off of the car, but are inside the mounds of fast food trash, beer cans/bottles, a cooler, antiquated camping gear, a boom box, autoparts from repairs of the past, left over pizza, 2 liters of coke, NOS canasters (of the whipped cream variety) and other questionable marerials. The struts have been shot for 5000miles, the front right spring is rusted through. The trunk contains rook racks, firewood, warm clothes, a picnic table, and enough tools and spare parts/fluids to service the ISS. The eject button on the fatory tape player is busted and unit dissasembly in required to change tapes. Shakedown St. (the album) played on repeat for 7 months. The speakers are all dryrotted. The horn is intermittant at best. There are appx a dozen air freshening trees on the rearview, and a crumpled piece of paper holds the ex-automatic replacement mirror in place. My electric razor is mounted like an old car phone. The dash board has has broken glass on it for over a year. A 70's model woodgrain police scanner is taped to the center console and is on whenever the car is running. The fuel door will not latch (lock missing) and a state trooper's "do no steal gas" sticker in on the inside. The rear of the car is covered in hippy-esque stickers, most prominately, "m.o.e". This is my daily driver.
So does anybody have that beat? What should I do next? Either oil or cupholders...
That sounds embarasing!! The first thing I would do is clean it out, but wait she might fall apart if you do that!!! Just put her out of her missery!!!
The inspection sticker looks like used gift wrap and has our state police logo drawn on with a felt tip pen. The plates are switched with some reguarity, and bogus ID's are kept in the vehicle at all times. Insurance in photoshopped. A 70's model woodgrain police scanner is taped to the center console and is on whenever the car is running.
Umm... Are you retarded? Apart from the car clearly not being road worthy and a death trap. If you get caught driving that car with all the fake documents and police scanner in it you will be screwed. I can't even begin to fathom the amount of charges that would be laid on you. And why in gods name would you even admit to any of this? Your an idiot.
The only thing you should be doing with that car is turning it into a cube.
I tell the cops that I enjoy listening to them while I drive pizza, I usaully just get defective equiptment tickets, but they're pretty easy to drop. She has been faithfull to me, i feel like I owe her a few more miles. I just want to show what one of these babies can withstand. Ok, I got ahold of a camera. I'm actually considering driving it to California this summer. It has new brakes, alternator, radiator, fuel pump, recent hoses. I figure I might throw in some plugs and set of jy struts, maybe a clutch, and hit the road. I've got free labor for the struts and clutch, and i could get the headlight working with some JB weld and some zip ties. Sorry 56k guys but without further ado...
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Holy sh*** man Are you missing a leg. Why are you driving with you left foot? Aaahhww. she doesnt look so bad. jus make sure the cooling system works. change the tranny fluid every 30000 oil at at least 5000, make sure the brakes work and insure and register it for your drive. You just might make it. Good luck!
That looks like my friend's '79 Volvo. The front grill, while being original, is only half-there and spraypainted black. The (once black) body is splotchy silvery white from oxidation. Steering wheel is covered with duct tape, then covered again in saran wrap when he figured out that duct tape "leeches" the sticky stuff after a few days in the sun. Dashboard is covered in astro turf to hide the cracks. The "front" of the dash is currently almost removed and rests in the trunk. Sunroof does not work, and to open either of the doors (car only has two) from the inside requires rolling down the window and pulling the handle on the outside, since there are none inside. Shift knob is a tennis ball, and the electronic overdrive stopped working long ago so he drives it like a 4-speed. Amazingly, it still gets MPG in the high 20's. The entire car reeks of a bad mixture of pot, pizza, and beer, and a stash of the former could be found in a sandwich bag hidden behind a fake "switch" in what's left of the dash. The back seat and back floor are covered in car parts, and sitting there is next to impossible. And, of course, what's a car without old, bubbly tint on the back window that's probably been there since 1979. Unfortunately, I don't have any pictures of this car since he (somehow) drove the thing all the way from Sacramento to Arizona for school.
first off, i say that the car is really old and needs a new fender for the passenger side. but what you can do is take out some things out of the car that you don't need. the more weight the car has the harder the engine will work and the more gas the car will consume.
but dont worry you don't have the worst corolla, the worst ones are in the junk yard where they have been sitting there for years and are no longer running.
how could you drive something like that. Not so much the problems. But the fact the car looks really dirty, like clean out the back seat, have some respect for yourself :|
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