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[OT] marriage -->joke<--
MARRIAGE...
You know what I did before I got married? Anything I wanted to.
-- Henny Youngman
The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that
perhaps they're too old to do it.
-- Anne Bancroft
Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.
-- Benjamin Franklin
My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
-- Henny Youngman
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
-- Rodney Dangerfield
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
-- Milton Berle
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
-- George Burns
What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? About 30
pounds.
-- Cindy Garner
When women are depressed, they either eat or go shopping. Men invade
another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.
-- Elaine Boosler
I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There is water in
the carburetor." I said, "Where's the car? She said, "In the lake."
-- Henny Youngman
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
-- Phyllis Diller
My mother buried three husbands, and two of them were just napping.
-- Rita Rudner
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
-- Henny Youngman
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