I’d keep the Highlander if it were me. Better build quality and different class of vehicle IMO. CRV would be more comparable to a RAV4. More prone to rusting out and wouldn’t perform as well in an accident.

 

I have a 2000 Accord with just 93k miles that I inherited from my dad about a year ago. Many of the bits need fixing. The windshield wiper linkage is shot (this is California- no rain), the brake fluid level switch needs replacing, and they completely failed at soldering the cluster, as well as the master relay. It is a good runner. The engine is still strong, but the transmission flares a bit.
I have a 2001 HL base 4 cyl with 164000 miles. Solid. Yes, I have replaced a window motor, radiator, valve cover gasket, and AC condenser as well as routine maintenance, but I prefer the HL.

Based on my experience I would choose the HL in a heart beat. But then again, you are on the Toyota forum.

But both are better than average. You probably won’t go wrong either way. Both will need some work.

 

It seems like both vehicles need some work which could be costly. The Highlander needs engine work and the CRV seems to need suspension work. I personally would repair the Toyota rear main leak myself and roll with it. Honda transmissions seem to be an issue with high mileage; so that maybe the next major repair for it. Toyota transmission seem to last well over 300k miles.